


Your protector, your guardian.

by Deathshandx



Category: League of Legends
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anxiety, Depression, Fluff, M/M, Relationship Issues, cute stuffs, struggles
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-21
Updated: 2016-02-20
Packaged: 2018-05-22 07:30:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6070557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Deathshandx/pseuds/Deathshandx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shen is very over protective of zed, and zed is a little unstable. These are the tales of their relationship when one struggles with multiple issues and the other is trying his hardest to keep the relationship stable and look after their significant other.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Your protector, your guardian.

Zed sighed, rolling around in bed, he had no will to even get up and start his day. He had been laying here for hours, ever since he woke up at around 10, he had been just falling back asleep and waking up repeatedly. There was no motivation to do anything, he felt so empty inside and didn't know why. Picking up his phone next to him, he checked the time, 3 in the afternoon. Shen would be home in about an hour, and he knew that Shen wouldn't want to see him like this, lazing around doing nothing productive at all. 

Forcing himself out of bed, Zed sighed and trudged over towards the bathroom, turning on the shower to the hottest temperature before stripping his clothing and stepping in. The water burned his skin but he didn't care, he just wanted to be embraced by the warmth of it. Pressing his back against the wall, he sat with the water running over him, head hung as he stared at the floor of the shower. Closing his eyes, the steam clogged his lungs, making it harder for him to breathe, but he didn't mind, he was used to this sensation. It was almost calming to him, having the warmth and steam embrace him, it made him feel alive in a way. He knew he couldn't stay in here forever, but just a bit longer, he kept telling himself that. As the minutes passed, zed opened his eyes quickly, "shit" he muttered to himself realizing that he was supposed to be out of the shower half an hour ago. 

Stumbling as he turned off the water and walked out, he wrapped a towel around his waist and walked back into his bedroom. Picking up his phone, he looked at the time and realized he only had less than ten minutes before Shen was home. Drying off and slipping on a sweater and some sweatpants, Zed made his way to the living room of their small apartment, plopping down on the couch with his phone in his hands. While the shower had temporarily made him feel better, he was starting to feel awful again. That feeling slowly creeping up in his stomach, making his eyes heavy and his chest feel compressed. Running his fingers over his phone fidgeting with it, he tried his best to keep himself distracted from these feelings. 

He just needed Shen to be here, that was the only thing that could comfort him when he was getting like this, and its why he usually would stay in bed all day until he heard from him, or saw him. He didn't want to seem needy all the time, but he couldn't help it, he was needy, and he did need that sense of security, and that was what Shen gave him, which is why he was so happy when with him. Being away from him though, that was the hard part, sure Shen was only gone from 8am to 4pm, but he still missed him. 

The click of the lock on the door pulled Zed from his thoughts, causing him to drop his phone. A smile grew on his lips though as he saw Shen walk in, he was finally home and Zed couldn't be happier. Shen closed the door behind him and kicked his shoes off before plopping down on the couch and embracing Zed in his arms. Zed buried his face in his boyfriend's shoulder, taking in the scent of him and snuggling even closer. 

This is what he had been waiting all day for, looking up at his lover, Zed spoke, "How was work love?" he planted a soft kiss on Shen's cheek before resting his head in his lap. 

Shen let out a soft sigh, running a hand through Zed's hair "It was alright, same old thing as every day, you know." his voice seemed a bit different from usual, as if something was bothering him.

"Babe..." Zed trailed off, he could sense that something was bugging Shen. "Whats wrong, you don't sound happy." 

"Its just...you still seem sleepy, like you just woke up not long ago." he looked down at Zed, a look of disappointment in his eyes "When did you get out of bed?" 

Zed froze as he heard this question, he knew he was going to be scolded for this, he just hadn't thought that he would be caught sleeping late. Staying quiet, he tried to avoid answering the question that had been asked of him. 

"Zed." Shen said sternly, "When. Did. You. Get. Up." he wasn't mad with him, but he had been trying to work on Zed waking up earlier and he knew he wasn't cooperating. He only wanted what was best for him, staying in bed all day wasn't healthy, and on top of that, he was barely eating too, he didn't like seeing Zed like this and he could only watch him when he was home, not while he was at work. 

Zed felt a lump in his throat "I...." he turned his face away from Shen, he felt incredibly guilty "I woke up at 3....I'm sorry..." he trailed off, hoping he would be forgiven. 

Sighing, Shen stood up and walked over to the kitchen "You need to eat. I'm not mad at you, but you're not taking care of yourself darling." 

Saying nothing, Zed followed him to the kitchen and sat at one of the chairs, sitting there at the table watching Shen's movements. Shen was busy going through the fridge, trying to find something he could use to cook dinner for the two of them, usually Zed would cook for them, but he was trying to make sure that Zed was eating healthy, rather than just microwaved junk. After a few minutes of looking, Shen closed the fridge and walked over to the stove, holding a carton of eggs and a bag of spinach in his hands. As he prepared the stove and everything else, Zed let out a soft whining noise as he saw what he was going to eat. 

"Can't we just get a pizza?" Zed whined, he didn't have an issue with eating healthy, but he just wanted to stuff his face with junk food and cry while Shen held him. 

"No, we can't get a pizza Zed." Shen turned around, spatula in his hand and walked over to Zed, lightly tapping him on the head with it "You need to eat healthy, junk food will only mess up your system because you're not even eating as it is." 

Zed crossed his arms "Don't hit me with that!" he made an upset face with Shen "Fine, ill eat it, but only if you cuddle with me while I eat." 

Shen let out a soft laugh "Of course I will babe." he turned back to the stove and continued on cooking for a few more minutes before finishing. Pulling the pan with the eggs off the stove, he walked over to the cabinets and pulled out two plates. Dividing the food evenly, putting just a bit more on Zed's plate, he walked over to Zed and placed a plate in front of him. Pulling the other chair over, he placed it next to Zed's and sat down, pressing his body against his lover. 

A soft smile formed on Zed's lips as he felt Shen pressing against him. This is what he craved, this is all he ever wanted for the rest of his life, if he could have Shen with him for his life, he would die happy, regardless of if they were in a bad spot in their relationship, or in life. This was what he wanted, and he knew that, he knew this was it for him, that Shen was his soulmate, and as happy as it made him that he had found his one and only, he felt scared in a way though. The thoughts that this was going to be his only relationship for his whole life from here on out, that terrified him, because he felt like he wasn't good enough for Shen, he was always the one who had to be looked after, who had to be taken care of, the one who was emotionally unstable. He was also sometimes the worst boyfriend ever to Shen, not intentionally, but when he was in his unstable moments, he would lash out and say things he didn't mean, and he saw how it hurt Shen. He didn't know what to do though, he was so lost in life, and had no clue how to fix it, the only solace in this dark part was his relationship, but he was scared he would lose that too. 

The smile on Zed's face faded as these thoughts rushed through his mind, his breathing became slower and heavier as he ate his food, trying not to seem too sulky in front of Shen. After finishing his plate, he leaned over and planted a soft kiss on Shen's face before quietly moving away from him, he just needed to be alone right now, at least that's what he thought. Shen let out a soft sigh as he watched Zed walk away, he thought that Zed was okay, but it was obvious he wasn't. Zed walked into the bedroom, laying down on the bed and burying his face in the covers, he felt tears pricking in the corners of his eyes, and managed to blink them back, he didn't want to cry, but he felt absolutely awful, awful and guilty. 

Shen quietly opened the bedroom door, trying to make sure he wasn't seen. He walked over to Zed and wrapped his arms around him from behind, laying down next to him. He felt Zed's chest heave with a heavy, shaky breath. It broke his heart to see Zed like this, but all he could do was hold him and wait until it was over, he wasn't the best at comforting people, and he knew that, but for some reason he was always able to comfort Zed. 

Zed pushed himself closer into Shen's arms, turning to face him. "I'm so sorry, Shen.." his voice was shaky as he tried to maintain a calm composure. 

"Sweetheart..." Shen looked him in the eyes as he spoke "Why are you apologizing?" 

"I've been such an awful boyfriend to you, you could do so much better, you know?" Zed felt a tear run down his cheek as he spoke, his inner insecurities coming out "You're such an amazing person, and you're stuck with me, a pathetic pile of trash that has to rely on you for everything." 

Shen froze for a moment, trying to think of the right thing to say "Babe," he pressed his forehead against Zed's "that is not true. If you were an awful boyfriend I wouldn't be with you." 

That was when Zed broke down into a heavy sob, tears running down his cheeks, he felt so bad for even having to make Shen deal with comforting him. He didn't know what else to say, he didn't want to upset Shen by going on about how he's been a shitty boyfriend, but he also felt awful as all hell for having to make Shen comfort him every other day. Being held while he cried was one of the most amazing and comforting feelings ever, and even thought it happened often, it had always managed to make him feel better. They sat there in silence as Zed sobbed into Shen's shirt, getting it soaked with his tears, but Shen didn't mind. Shen ran a hand through Zed's hair and held him close with the other, resting his head on top of Zed's. His free hand patted Zed's lower back as he held him in an attempt to get him to stop crying. Shen was frustrated that he had to deal with this, not because it was time consuming, but because seeing the man he loved break down and feel like he wasn't good enough for Shen, that is what killed him. 

Eventually, Zed had calmed down, and as he did, Shen planted a kiss on his forehead. "You need to rest my love, we're going out tomorrow remember?" Shen said softly, not moving his mouth from Zed's hair. He felt a soft nod come from Zed in understanding. Pulling away from Shen, Zed looked up at him and pressed his lips against Shen's for a couple of seconds before pressing his face back into Shen's chest. His breathing slowed back to normal, and he felt himself drifting off to sleep while being embraced by the love of his life, as he fell asleep, Shen did too. 

While the conflict tonight was an every other day occurrence, Shen couldn't help but feel guilty, he wished he knew how to comfort Zed, but he was slowly getting better. He was willing to wait for however long it took for Zed to get better, because that's what true love is, looking after each other in times of weakness, and Shen swore he would protect and care for Zed even if it cost him everything.


End file.
